timing

"When God plants the seed of his word in your life he is not asking you to make it happen as soon as possible. He is asking you to have faith." - Matt Helmsley, associate pastor of my church on Sunday.

Germination of 2000-year-old seeds

In the 1970s, during excavations at Herod the Great's palace on Masada in Israel, two thousand year old Judean date palm seeds were recovered. The cache of seeds was found contained in an ancient jar, and had experienced a very dry, sheltered environment, which helped to preserve the seeds. Radiocarbon dating at theUniversity of Zurich confirmed the age of the seeds at 2000 ±50 years. After their discovery the seeds were held in storage for thirty years at Bar-Ilan University.

On 25 January 2005, the Jewish festival of Tu Bishvat (Arbor Day), Dr. Elaine Solowey, a specialist in rare and medicinal plants at the Arava Institute for Environmental Studies pretreated several of the seeds in a fertilizer and hormone-rich solution. She then planted three of the seeds at Kibbutz Ketura in the Arabah desert of southern Israel.[1] One of the seeds sprouted six weeks later. As of June 2008, the tree has nearly a dozen fronds, and is nearly 1.4 m (4 ft) tall.

The plant has been nicknamed "Methuselah," after the longest-lived person in the Bible. Methuselah is remarkable in being the oldest known tree seed successfully germinated, and also in being the only living representative of the Judean date palm, a tree extinct for over 1800 years, which was once a major food and export crop in ancient Judea.

Date palm trees are dioecious. If Methuselah is female, it may produce fruit by 2010. Methuselah's seeds could then be used to cultivate additional Date palm trees.

When compared with three other cultivars of date palm, genetic tests showed the plant to be most closely related to the old Egyptian variety Hayany (also Hiani, Hayani), 13% of its DNA being different.^[3] They may have shared the same wild ancestor.

In addition to its honoured place in Judean history, the palm may contribute useful characteristics such as environmental tolerance and disease resistance, to modern date cultivars.

Dr. Sarah Sallon, the head of the project, wants to see if the ancient tree has any unique medicinal properties no longer found in today's date palm varieties. “The Judean date was used for all kinds of things from fertility, to aphrodisiacs, against infections, against tumors,” she said. “This is all part of the folk story.”

"On Quiso, the Tuginda used to teach us that real and actual trust in God was the whole life of a priestess. 'God can afford to wait,' she used to say. 'Whether to convert the unbelieving, to reward the just or to punish the wicked - God can afford to wait. With Him, everything comes home in the end. Our work is not only to believe that, but to show that we believe it by everything that we say and do.'"

- Richard Adams in "Shardik"

eureka!

Have you ever had a moment when you suddenly realize that two things you hold dear, two seemingly opposing thoughts or dreams, come together and actually compliment each other? I had a moment like that recently and it was pretty earth shaking. How did it ever take me so long to see this? Surely the hints have been there for ages.

For me these two passions were worship and justice or compassion for the poor. I felt the call towards both, yet saw them as completely separate things.

Then, I was reading "Beyond Cheap Grace" by Eldin Villafane. In the third essay of the book, titled "Amos, Intrepid Leader for Justice: Three Indispensable Qualities of a Minister of the Word of God" he says this:

"Throughout Scripture we can find important truths about worship that relate authentic worship to our behavior toward the poor and oppressed."

"There is a seamless relationship between ethical behavior and true worship, between justice and piety. Who we are and how we behave are intimately related in our giving worth to our God."

Of course! I think I knew this, but never actually realized it and so continued on with a separated mindset about my calling and my passions. How liberating and validating and exciting to realize (finally) that these two things I hold dear go hand in hand!

I was equally moved, in a slightly different way, by Heidi Baker's book "Compelled by Love." This is a collection of stories and thoughts anchored on the Beatitudes. I was consistently challenged by Heidi's words. I find that often when reading or thinking about things like serving out of love I find myself looking into the distant future when I will be in ministry and all I do will flow effortlessly out of my love for God and those around me. And the whole world will be faintly tinted pink and we will dance in fields of flowers forever.

But this time I was really challenged practically by her words about my life, now. Where I am at this moment. I am very sad to say that I am altogether not very good at showing love to those around me. Especially when I find myself confronted by needy people (friends and family members no less!) when I am tired from work and selfishly want to be left alone to read or watch tv.

The question I'm asking myself (not for the first time either!) is how exactly do I think I'm going to get to dance in those pink-tinted fields of flowers, loving everyone around me effortlessly (!) if I don't learn to love where I am, even when (especially when) it's hard?

Oh, the other thing I was challenged on by Heidi is trusting God. Trusting that, as he promised, he will provide for me and that there is always enough in his kingdom. As Heidi said:

"All that Jesus died for is waiting for you to take. We are called to live in the fullness of what each precious drop of blood purchased. Start feasting now."

So, that's a look into what I'm working through. What my inner life is looking like these days.

I am, besides, the only one
Who can be bright without the sun.
~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

my opinion

Last night (well, I suppose it would be more accurate to say this morning) I finished the final book of the Harry Potter series. I must say I don't understand the reaction they have received in the Christian community over the last ten years.

They seem to me quite a powerful allegory of the Christian life. Someone paid the price for us to live by Their own willingness to die in our place. We finally overcome that same evil in our lives by our own choices of love and self-sacrifice. And I guess I always feel like magic in stories is just a picture of the supernatural.

So, I suppose I could understand not liking them if you believe that the supernatural is not for us any longer. That Jesus' promise that we would do greater things than he did died out with the first century apostles. But I do not believe that. I believe that God's promises are sure and never ending. And I believe that we should always be aiming for the kind of belief and trust that leads to such great authority that we can fly or walk on water or be translated from one place to another or even see dead people raised up.

I believe that we need to stop limiting God with our own fears. This morning I read in Isaiah that "a trusting life will never topple." And I think we all know that "love never fails." So whatever else I do with my life, my goal is always enlarging my capacity to love and my capacity to trust.

sometimes i catch myself by surprise

I was just reading through my journal from last term, working on a timeline of my time in Transit that I started in January, when I found this prayer written on January 22:

I would like to learn how to be uncomplicated. How to see things simply, through the eyes of trust. Father, I thank you that you promise to give me hope for the future and that you promise to give me the future I hope for. I thank you for promising to place desires in my heart and to give me the desires of my heart. I thank you that all of your promises are sure and never-failing. I thank you for being good and trust-worthy. Thank you for your love that is never-ending. You look inside my heart and see things that I can't see.

why is this so difficult?

Today I was walking down high street. I was on my way home after a lovely birthday brunch with the girls. I decided to pop into Gap on the off chance they might have a red t-shirt Emily got in London that I really liked. Since I wasn't really expecting them to have it, I stopped at H&M on my way. There was a really pretty purple t-shirt that I decided to try on and then decided to buy it.

I thought I would skip Gap, but I was too curious, so I went in there too. They didn't have the t-shirt but they did have this really pretty light-weight sweater in the same color, on sale. So I looked at it longingly for a minute but left. Then went back in to try it on. It was beautiful. I thought, "I'll just take the other one back cause I can't have both." Then I heard, "Why not? Why can't I be extravagant?" I ended up not only buying the sweater but also a blue cami that I had seen in London and was now on sale.

I've been wrestling with whether or not I should take something back. The thing is I don't need three new tops. I don't even need one new top. I can't really afford one either. At least that's what wisdom would say. But I'm caught by the possibility that the Lord is the one who asked why he can't be extravagant with me. It might've just been me, my own desires whispering to me in a moment of weakness.

I've been re-reading Captivating recently and I just read this the other day: "This is how we trust him. We accept what he has to say. We let it be true." And so, I have decided to keep all three new tops. It's a rather reckless decision. Not much wisdom in it at all. But even if I'm hearing wrong, I'm making the decision to trust. If that was my own thoughts and not the Lord's I'm trusting that he will take care of me, provide for me, anyway. And if it was him, then I'm full of thanks that he cares enough to want to give me something so silly and completely unnecessary.

does anybody have a testimony of grace?

Last week was this term's mission week. (Each term we have a week to get out of Guildford and do something "missional.") I was part of a group that went to a place in England called The Cotswold's. We stopped to pray as we were entering the valley we were visiting, asking the Lord for direction because we really didn't have any plans other than see what he wanted to do. Frances felt like we should get off the motorway and take the back roads and I had a word about seeking out old paths.

So Frances took the map and started navigating us away from the main roads. As we were looking for the right road we passed one called "Old Road" so we turned around and went down it. We decided to stop at this little old church to explore and pray a bit. While we were there a lady came in to do a lunch time prayer for Lent. We asked if we could join her and told her a bit of what we were doing.

She ended up asking us back to her house for tea and cake. While we were there she shared some of her story. She and her husband and a couple other families in the area had felt the Lord leading them to worship where they lived instead of traveling to bigger churches with more things happening in the spirit. So, for the last several years they had been attending this little Anglican church with ever dwindling numbers, praying for God to do something in their village.

She was so encouraged just to have us there, she said she had been praying for the Lord to do something just to show her that he was hearing their prayers. We prayed with her for a while before we left. It was really cool!

When we got back home I had a package waiting from my mom with all the stuff to do my taxes. (And some other fun stuff!) Over the summer I had used my credit cards to pay for Transit, trusting the Lord to provide the money to pay them off before I left. The money didn't come and I had whipped through my savings by January making payments on them. My parents aren't in a position to help me out and so I was planning to cash in some stock that was given to me when I quit my job to be able to make payments until the end of Transit. I was hoping my tax return would be enough to have a bit of spending money for the rest of the time, I was hoping for $500. When I did my taxes online my return came to almost $1400!!! Which should be enough to pay my credit cards through the end of Transit and have a bit of spending money too!

It's funny how difficult I make things sometimes. I worked really hard to stay in a place of peace and of trusting the Lord to provide, really, really hard. And then he did. And I felt a bit silly for all the effort I had to put into it! The lesson isn't quite over yet as I still don't know what is happening when Transit finishes (July 4th is our last day) and while the Lord provided enough to make payments for a while, I still have all that debt to pay off completely. Hopefully the trusting will be a bit easier this time!

PS, Pictures were taken but not by me, I'll post some when friends have put them on Facebook and I can steal them!

a very eloquent summary of what I've been learning lately, by Eugene Peterson

One of the stubbornly enduring habits of the human race is to insist on domesticating God. We are determined to tame him. We figure out ways to harness God to our projects. We try to reduce God to a size that conveniently fits our plans and ambitions and tastes. But our Scriptures are even more stubborn in telling us that we can't do it. God cannot be fit into our plans, we must fit into his. We can't use God - God is not a tool or appliance or credit card.
"Holy" is the word that sets God apart and above our attempts to enlist him in our wish-fulfillment fantasies or our utopian schemes for making our mark in the world. Holy means that God is alive on God's terms, alive in a way that exceeds our experience and imagination. Holy refers to life burning with an intense purity that transforms everything it touches into itself.
Because the core of all living is God, and God is a holy god, we require much teaching and long training for living in response to God as he is and not as we want him to be. All our god-fantasies of "give us what we want when we want it on our own terms" in fact do is cripple or kill us. Leviticus is a start at the much teaching and long training that continues to be adapted and reworked in every country and culture where God is forming a saved people to live as he created them to live - hold as God is holy.
The first thing that strikes us as we read Leviticus in this light is that this holy God is actually present with us and virtually every detail of our lives is affected by the presence of this holy God; nothing in us, our relationships, or environment is left out. The second thing is that God provides a way (the sacrifices and feasts and Sabbaths) to bring everything in and about us into his holy presence, transformed in the fiery blaze of the holy. It is an awesome thing to come into his presence and we, like ancient Israel, stand in his presence at every moment. Our Lord is not dwelling in a tent or house in our neighborhood. But he makes his habitation in us and among us as believers and says, "I am holy; you be holy." (Leviticus 11:44)
Once we realize this, the seemingly endless details and instructions of Leviticus become signposts of good news to us: God cares that much about the details of or lives, willing everything in and about us into the transformation that St. Paul later commended:

"So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life - your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life - and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you." (Romans 12:1-2)

PS, sorry its so long!

from london, well egham really

I have arrived safely and soundly. Will post soon about everything but want to take some time first. I just wanted to share this story which was recently shared with me:

Legend from the Cherokee Indians


Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth's rite of passage? His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a Man. He cannot tell the other boys of this experience, because each lad must come into manhood on his own. The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could
become a man.!


Finally, after a horrific night the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm. We, too, are never alone.

Even when we don't know it, our Heavenly Father is watching over us, Sitting on the stump beside us. When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him. OurFather would Never leave us alone, A love like none other!

a little ditty

When I was little we had a tape by Psalty the Singing Songbook. Only one, the camping adventure. I don't remember much about it but I have always remembered this rather profound little song;

I cast all my cares upon you.
I lay all of my burdens down at your feet.
And anytime I don't know what to do,
I will cast all my cares upon you.

I was just thinking of that song last night, really needing to (once again) express that to the Lord.

The Beach

I got back Sunday from a working beach trip. The girls were great and we had a fun, albeit exhausting, trip. We were out on the beach and in the pool and went to their grandfather's tree farm where we rode gators all around the 300 acre property. I had Saturday off and spent it laying on the beach reading. And burning. It was a lovely day for which I am still paying... OUCH!

I wanted to share something really cool that happened on the trip; A couple Sundays ago at church we had a special offering for Zao Water, a project that raises funds to dig wells in Africa. I felt compelled to give, and not just my standard special offering amount, something big, something challenging. And I did, while saying, "Ok Lord, I trust you. It's your money anyway so you're going to have to provide that much more for me to go to London." On the beach trip I was given double the amount I put in that offering.

Great is your faithfulness oh Lord!

Courage to trust beyond our fears!

A week or so ago I subscribed to the Moravian Daily Text. Everyday you get an email with a couple of Bible verses and a prayer. They can be really timely. Yesterday I had a bit of a crisis of faith. I decided to add up some totals for Transit and somehow the discrepancies between incoming and projected outgoing seemed bigger than before. So I had a few hours of trying to relax and trust. Then this morning I woke up to this:

The Lord makes a way in the sea, a path in the mighty waters.
Isaiah43:16

And Jesus said to the disciples, "Why are you afraid, you of little faith?"
Matthew 8:26

Making a way in the sea, you direct us beyond ourselves. Forgive us for
wanting assurances when you have asked us to have faith. Give us the courage to
trust beyond our fears. Amen.

Exactly, exactly!

(Oh, if you want to subscribe yourself just visit this website: http://www.moravian.org/daily_texts/)

There's no other way to be happy in Jesus

This was a rough day. I'm inexplicably tired. Work was frustrating. And I wasted 2.5 hours watching tv.

I've been waiting for several months to hear whether or not I've been accepted for a training program that would finally get me started on my life dream. I had an email yesterday, but it was only to say that they've updated the website and that they would be in touch in some undefined time frame. Even though the program starts in September apparently they haven't even started looking at applications yet. I had mine in in February. I've been trying so hard not to count on this. But this is it for me. This is the last door I know to knock on, every other one has been very firmly shut. So, try as hard as I can not to, I'm finding it impossible to not "put all my eggs in this basket."

I've told myself all the right things, over and over. The Lord will open the right door at the right time. If this isn't it, that just means the Lord has something better ahead. But after 3 shut doors and years of waiting they are all starting to sound a bit trite.

We had a guest speaker from Germany at church last week, Walter Heidenreich. He had a really "wow" message. He said that the Lord has everything, there is nothing he is missing, nothing we could give him that he doesn't already have. Heaven is full of saved people so evangelism is out, worship, and intercession are too. The only thing missing is faith. "They don't need faith in heaven because they see everything." The one thing we can give to God to please him is faith. And I seem so lacking in it right now..........

But the thing of it is, I like to think of this dream as mine. This grandiose vision for my life as belonging to me. But here's the reality; it's not. There is no way I could come up with all this stuff on my own. And not even a hope of a chance I could accomplish even one bit of it without Jesus. So I don't know why I get so upset by the challenges along the way. It is not my job to make sure this happens. My job is to trust. Trust and obey.

So, as Jesus gives me the strength to hold on to him, I will start again tomorrow.